Former New South Wales star Brett Finch has opened up on the tumultuous lows that have followed his decorated career, with the former NRL journeyman revealing the drug and alcohol-related downfalls that saw his life spiral.
The 40-year-old first revealed the battles he had faced with mental health in 2019, being admitted into a rehabilitation facility following an incident on an interstate flight.
The former Raiders, Roosters, Eels and Storm playmaker was stood down by Channel Nine five years ago, further compounding his post-career downfall.
Speaking on the Turn Up The Talk podcast, Finch revealed the lengths he would go to in hiding trips to his "dealer", even lying to his partner about heading to work.
“I pretend to wake up, put my radio shirt on because I was working for 2GB Continuous Call at the time … I’ve already called Ray (Hadley) to tell him I was sick,” Finch said.
“Get in the car, go straight to me dealer’s house. My missus is from Melbourne, she’s not going to be listening to the radio.
“I’m thinking, ‘Finchy, you magnificent bastard,’ … I’m just going to go get on it all day.”
Finch, who was soon facing immense financial struggles, revealed his secrets were eventually uncovered by his partner, Elli.
“Elli knew exactly where I’d gone,” Finch added.
“She said, ‘I’m out, I’m going,’ and packs her bags and goes back to Melbourne.
“I get home, now I’m stood down from both jobs, and I go to my account and I’ve got minus $10. Eighteen months earlier, I had hundreds of thousands.
“And my first thought is, where can I pick up, where can I get another one from?
“It’s taken everything from me but my thought is, I still want another one. It’s ridiculous, I’ve just lost everything.
“I sat there and — not that I’ve ever contemplated suicide — but I sat there and went, mate, this is not living, this is existing.
“I don’t have a dollar to my name, I’ve got no job, me missus has left, this is not living.”
The former Blues half has since returned to radio in joining 1170 SEN, while also hosts his own podcast Uncensored.
Finch played a total of 330 top-flight matches across a heralded NRL career, as well as a stint abroad with English Super League outfit the Wigan Warriors.